Childhood, Homeschooling

“Children are Born Persons” and Swim Lessons

Today, at swim lessons, I had an annoying encounter with the swim instructor that reminded me of how much we, as a society, think children aren’t people overall, that their opinions don’t count because they aren’t fully formed yet and need to be molded into an adult. Anyway, I always ask my son if he wants to go underwater before we do dips in the pool – and I wait for a response. Halfway through today, he told me he was all done, so we stopped doing dips for the last couple minutes. After, the instructor told pointed out that as the adults, we shouldn’t phrase commands as questions to our children because it teaches them they have a choice when they aren’t capable of making one yet. He stressed that this piece of well-meant advice was from the education he has been receiving on how to teach small children.  I didn’t say anything, because we see him for 30 minutes once a week – who cares, really? And, a pool full of toddlers is not the place for a debate. Furthermore, what he actually said was true – you shouldn’t phrase commands as a question, it just doesn’t apply in this case, because it wasn’t a command. Inside, I was irritated. Of course he has a choice! He’s demonstrated very clearly that he knows what I’m asking, and has the vocabulary to say more, all done, no more, yes and no quite easily. I think it is much more harmful to teach him that he doesn’t have a choice, when he should – how would you like to be dunked underwater for no reason if you didn’t want to be? If for 4 weeks he refused to go underwater and I felt it was inhibiting his water safety, I might change it to a command instead of a question, but for right now – he is cooperative until he has had enough and I feel that should be respected. Teaching him that his cooperation is rewarded and that his opinion matters seems to me like it will go a lot farther towards promoting good behavior and developing a relationship of trust between us than not taking into account his feelings about what we’re doing in the pool.

“Children are born persons.” This is principle one of Charlotte Mason’s system of education and I have been reading about it lately to prepare for a study group one of my sisters-in-laws is hosting tonight. It seems like a really obvious statement, right? Everyone knows that children are people – but as a society we don’t treat them as people. We talk down to them, simplify our language, tell them what they can and cannot like, and generally feed them mental garbage. Our education system is definitely like this – in school we teach excerpts from good books, we set standards and assume they all have to meet the same mold, we dictate who they should be, how they should behave and what they should know based on their age. We tell them what to think and then are amazed when they reach the higher levels of education and do not know how to think for themselves. After years of completely ignoring the fact that children are capable of really really good thoughts, we expect them to share their thoughts and still think that those thoughts have value. I’ve been irritated by this since I was a child, and I distinctly remember looking up to certain people who treated me with respect even though I was young.

To clarify, I know that children are less mature and have less knowledge and life experience – I don’t recommend we let our children have total freedom. My 19 month old regularly throws temper tantrums, tries to touch hot things, wanders too close to the street, and is pretty willing to run straight into the water even without his life jacket on – he doesn’t know enough not to yet. He IS still a person though who is capable of making some choices, of telling me what he wants, of coming up with new ideas, fun games and contributing positively to life. He is capable of putting his pajamas in the hamper every morning, and while I’m not willing to fight with him over this yet on the rare morning he isn’t excited to do it, I generally expect him to do so. As a part of the family, he needs to know his contributions, even as small as one piece of clothing in the laundry, matter. It doesn’t save me any work, it takes twice as long for him to carry his pajamas to the hamper under my supervision, but he is SO PROUD of himself, because he knows he is being useful, and that is something I want to instill in him. I don’t want to tell him to go play by himself while I clean up after him – that is counterproductive if I want him to be a capable adult someday.

It isn’t just his abilities that matter, though. Charlotte Mason also stresses that children need lots of free play to be allowed to learn about themselves and trust in their capabilities. This is something I believed before I started learning about her principles of educating young people. My son is really good at playing outside, he loves it – “outshide! outshide!” is a refrain you can hear at all hours of the day in our house no matter the weather and I try to foster that. I find though, that if I sit and be boring or try to read, he gets bored pretty quickly and wants interaction. If, on the other hand, I go outside and start weeding the garden, he usually starts out next to me helping and then slowly wanders away to play at whatever game he has invented while pulling weeds up. Recently he discovered you can knock leaves off trees with a stick and the memory of that belly laugh will stay with me forever. Simply by being productive and present I end up fostering independent play and his imagination – it is good motivation to actually get up and weed my garden.

Today’s conversation at the pool, and the reading I’ve been doing on Charlotte Mason’s first principle have just served as a reminder to respect my son, and I am grateful for that, I guess that’s all I’m trying to say.

Childhood, Homeschooling

Toddler Teaching Tools

I’ve been working with my 1.5 year old to help him learn some of his basics lately like ABCs, 123s, shapes, colors, animals and their sounds and body parts. I have gone through a few different teaching tools and games and I thought I would post a review so that other people might have an easier time finding good stuff. He is too little to really sit and learn anything, of course, but everyday I try to find time to play with him in an educational way and incorporate learning without it feeling like pre-school. I’ve listed my favorite 6 toys and the alternatives that didn’t work out so well to hopefully save you a little work 🙂

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Cooking

Whole Grain Homemade Apple Cinnamon Freezer Waffles for the Littles (and Bigs)

My almost 15 month old loves those frozen toaster waffles, but I don’t love that they’re full of sugar. I set out to make a delicious whole grain version with actual fruit instead of sugar. The result: Real apples, cinnamon and oats – it’s like healthy apple crisp you can pop in the toaster oven and it’s so easy to whip up a batch and store! Bonus: They can easily be made gluten and dairy free for those on special diets.

Ingredients:

2 cups Quick Cooking Oats

3/4 cup milk (can be replaced with non-dairy milk)

3/4 cup water

2 eggs

2 tbsp buckwheat flour (or regular flour – you do you!)

2 apples finely chopped

 

Warm up your waffle iron! Add all the ingredients except the apples to a large bowl to let the oaks soak up the liquids while you prep the apples.

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I like to use my food processor to chop the apples. I chunk them so they fit into my small counter top one. I prefer to leave the skins on because A) it’s easier and B) nutrients. But mostly A. Once the waffles are cooked the skins are soft anyway, so they’re no longer a choking hazard for the littlest littles.

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I add the apples. Mix thoroughly and cook them up. I hand a few fresh warm ones to my baby and let the rest cool. Once they’re a bit firmer I split them into quarters and store them so they’re easy to pull out of the freezer and toast.

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Healthy, delicious snacks for my son – voila! Note: My husband ate two of the waffles from the batch I made in this picture for lunch before they even made it to the freezer.

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Childhood, D.I.Y.

DIY Shapes and Colors Felt Toy Game for Toddlers.

My son is quite a bit too young to be ready for any formal education, but my husband and I think that learning is so important and we’re really excited to start teaching him things – anything! We like to incorporate learning into as much as possible, that includes solo play time. Recently, I made a wall-hanging felt game for Charlie that he loves to play with. Right now, he can’t play with it the way it was intended, but he loves that the felt pieces come off and stick back on, the bright colors keep him occupied, and he’s being exposed to the idea of shapes and colors. When Dave and I see him playing with it, we often take a few minutes to sit with him and talk him through what color and shape he’s currently playing with. It’s fun for everyone and it’s so so easy to make!

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Continue reading “DIY Shapes and Colors Felt Toy Game for Toddlers.”

Books We're Reading

Books We’re Reading (Feb 23 2018)

This past week, I was going to put my grand new plan of going to the library every Monday into action. We ended up at the the library Thursday afternoon. We were supposed to be focusing on picture books to help learn colors. One would think that with an extra three days to prepare for our trip to the library, I would have had a list ready and some idea of the books I wanted to get…. but nope – winging it all the way this week. The choices ended up being a bit more random because I was unprepared, but Charlie is enjoying the books anyway and it was a good chance to really familiarize myself with my library’s children’s section (Or at least try with a busy 13 month old on the loose!) We took home six books and we’ve read them all multiple times except for one that is a little too old for Charlie right now, but I’ve put it on a list to come back to when he’s a little older.

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